hoiitsroi :3

Alex is hella cute in this video, LOL.
Bringing back old memories with hoiitsroi! :D
Teehee. <3

Oh, and this one too. 

THROWWWWWWBACKKKKKKKK.

I believe this is based on looks.

CinnaMINGbear;

Hi Ryan.

It was so nice to see you today. :D
I'm always happy to see you even if you aren't happy to see me.
I'm sorry for not asking you about how you are and stuff. I'm no Karen, and I know I suck at stuff like this.

I do apologize though, for not keeping in touch with you. I'm guilty of that. Speaking of guilt, I finally finished your birthday/late Christmas gift. I was going to give it to you, but I sort of forgot to put a string around it. I hope you like it. I tried to make it to the best of my abilities.

Again, I'm sorry for not keeping in touch. That is my fault. ):

Hope you're doing well and stuff. I miss your happy-go-lucky personality that I love so much. I don't know if things changed, and I'll be honest, but it does feel like something has changed...

Ah, well. Just wanted to make a quick shout-ou to you, that's all. :)

I hate being so far away from you when you need me the most...
I love you oh so much, and I hate to see you like this. </3

Lately I've been thinking so strangely about the clouds. And how they slowly seem to fade away, yeah.

I want an adventure. Just the two of us. I'd like that a lot.

Words

I was just thinking.
Do words actually have value, or is it just the emotional sentiment that has the value?

I'm not sure.

Some advice

Some advice:
You might have a hard time making new friends in college.
You have to put yourself out there like a prostitute. It's like, the only way you can make friends. Or maybe you'll be lucky and have people approach you. It all depends. For me, I have to go put myself out there.

:D It's back to working on these. :3 For my cousin's birthday(s)!

Once.

These are just some random photos I took while here at SJSU.
They're actually just webcam photos.

I'll tell you a story about each one.

I took this photo when I got kicked out of my dorm because my desk light was keeping my roomate up. I'm in the common area. I ended up watching Anastasia and it was all bleh. It was alright, I learned that we had Wi-fi and I was able to access the internet from here. I wasn't too happy about being kicked out of my room, but I had to deal with it. I eventually talked with my roomate and we got stuff figured out.

Today I pledged to Alpha Phi Omega Gamma Beta. Otherwise known as APHIO (chapter Gamma Beta).
That's my pledge pin I got. I have to wear it everyday, everywhere. I'm so excited to be a part of this frat! For those of you who don't know APhiO is a co-ed community service fraternity. I met my sponsor and he seems pretty cool. I also met some of my big bros and big sisters! I'm also in a pledge class (41) people in my pledge class. I met some pretty awesome people in my pledge class. I "met" Bonnie, and Will. I don't know, everything was so awesome. I won't elaborate on it, in case it's supposed to be secret on how the initiate us.

Help pl0x

Am I retarded?
How does this equal 31?

Random.

Igloos. Misted In Super Sauce. Young Oranges United.

I'm in class right now.
Joe brooks.
The little things, I miss.
But you don't miss them at all do you? Or maybe you do, I wouldn't know I can't read minds.
I woke up veryyy cold today. The roomate left the window open. I freeze everytime. The cold air just hits me first. Whenever the wind blows, it blows through me and takes away all feeling. Numbness.

I am like a ticking time bomb,
Hear my clock tick tick tick
Watch my hands count down.
Tick tick tick
Tick tick tick

Boom.

The Corp (this post is so out of order)

It sounds weird, I know, but I miss the summer. The summer where I waited for you to come back home because I missed you. Every day felt like months, sometimes years, and not hearing back from you made me think that you didn't care. I now know that you did, and I don't know. I tried in my own way to make you remember me, to not forget me. Every time I saw you or got to be with you was an amazing moment, I was so happy. I got to see and be with you, no matter how brief, I cherished every moment. I'm sorry I just never told you that.

When you were out there with your corp, the look on your face after a performance, how you glow when you talk about the corp, everything, the passion you have when you were with them, on or off the field. I'm envious of it, but I also miss the way you glow, the way you carried yourself whenever you were with them. I miss the affect they had on you, I miss the way you...I don't know. For me, it feels like...you were happier with them, happier than I can ever provide. I'm not sad or anything, I'm just glad that I could see you so happy, so passionate about something. I'm proud that you are with them, I'm proud that you...actually cared for something as much as you did when you were with the corp. I look at myself, I see that I am nothing compared to the corp. I'm not sad, or mad, I'm just stating the facts as I see it. I will always be here for you, whenever you need me. I'm not your world, the corp is your world. It has always been your world since you've known it.

Now I see that school has started. I know you listen to them on Youtube. I know you miss them.
I miss you being with them. It hurts me because you aren't with them, and it hurts me that I will never get to experience what you got to experience. I won't get to experience it. I'll leave it to you to go back to, because...it brings the best out in you. It proves to everyone that you can do whatever you put your mind to. You serve as an inspiration to all who know you. You're intelligent, determined, strong, and you care. If I had half, or even a quarter of your talent, I'd  be amazing. But the fact is I don't have half of your talent, I have way less than that. You'll get far in life, where ever or whatever you dare to pursue. I love you, and I love what you do. It's admirable hard work that you do.

I can't do what you do. I couldn't stand it, I couldn't be part of it. You see, I was never passionate enough for what you do. I never had half of or even a quarter of your talent.
But you do. You have all the talent and willpower necessary to be in the corp.
And every time you think about it, every time you talk about it, just know that you're doing something that's meaningful to you, and inspirational to everyone else.

So don't give up. Keep working on what you're doing, because I know you'll be great. I just ask that you won't forget me when you become famous, and always remember all those who helped you along the way.

I love you. <3

Because bitcching and complaining about my life is easier than actually doing anything about it.

So, I couldn't sleep last night. The most sleep I got was mostly fitful rest. I kept waking up, tossing and turning, (I heard Angelica farting, that was like the third time I've heard her farting at night. Seriously I think she farts every night, and I just assume it was like the bed creaking or something. I've been lucky, I hadn't smelled anything...yet.)

I woke up at 3AM and attempted to go back to sleep. And now I'm here at the DC eating breakfast by myself. Say hi to my breakfast.

Diakfvorksnaks

I need a haircut.

Oh, and the thought if school and moving back into my dorm highly distresses me. I really don't want to go back, mainly because I feel very trapped there. There's only so much to do at SJSU.
I sort of hate the feeling I get when I'm there. I never feel satisfied. I always want to do things, but I have limited sources.

Tentative

Tentative

December 19th, 2012.

Sighz.

It's hard to help someone when the person you're trying to help doesn't want you there.
#relatable

Doubt

More doubts. I feel like everyone knows more about muscles and physical therapy than I do. Maybe I'm not meant for this...I mean like...at least they have basic knowledge. What do I have? I know nothing.

It hurts.

I had an ortho appointment a few days ago. They added two new brackets and they tightend everything.

The simplest things make my mouth burn or hurt. I know the pain will go away soon, but the stinging sensation won't go anytime soon.

Eating anything hard or solid would make my teeth hurt.
Brushing my teeth makes my upper lip (inside) sting and burn. Eating fruits makes it burn. It's a literal pain. I can't enjoy food that much at the moment. Apparently the pain is supposed to get worse though. They added some new things. When these "new things" start poking at my gums, then I have to go in again and get them...I don't know, taken off? Trimmed off? Something like that. Oh well, such is the life of I. In a state of semiconsistant uncomfort