Things I'd like to say

It's driving me crazy how I have to watch what I say, and be very careful with my words. I can't say

"Oh, you need to stop being so clingy and needy. You should really let her do what she wants, you need to stop being so dependent. You don't always need to have constant reassurance. You need to also develop you're own interests so it's not like you're just with her all the time. It's good to go out on your own and have experiences, so you have something to talk about. It shouldn't be a one sided thing where she's telling you all about her day, and you're experiencing it, but when she asks about your day, you should have something of interest to tell her as well. You need to go out as well, and make new friends. Your life can't revolve around her. Trying to transfer to UCSD might be the worst mistake of your life. What if you break up? What would you do then? You need to broaden your mind to what might happen, instead of just the now and near future. I feel like you only want to be with her, that's why you want to transfer there. I don't know if the engineering program is better there but I know we have one of the top engineering programs here at SJSU. But if you think this is the right thing to do, the by all means, go."

I can't say that. We're already dealing with a sensitive situation as is.

I also can't tell her, "Hey you need to stop ignoring your boyfriend. You say you can imagine a future with him and everything, but are you really? You go out a lot, you're very carefree and you just want to have fun, but you don't really think about your actions. You're very flirtatious with other guys, and that makes your boyfriend jealous and creates more issues. You need to tone it down if you're actually serious about having a relationship with this boy. You also know what bothers him, he tells you, you should be a little more considerate about it then. Sometimes I feel like you're just going with the flow. He needs a lot of attention. You knew this when you went into a relationship with him. It's even harder for him because you're so far away. What if he moves to UCSD, you'd have to spend more time with him because he's closer, and that would mean less time with your friends. Are you willing to make that sacrifice? You tell me you love him and you can imagine a future with him, but I'm not sure if you really can. Everything he's doing is to be with you, he's trying to bust ass in school just to transfer to UCSD to be with you. Personally, I don't think that's very smart, but if that's what he wants to do, then I'll let him do it. But you're a free spirit and I know you like your freedom. He'll go everywhere with you and he'll spend every waking moment with you as well."