Frustration.

I seriously hate how you treat me.

I thought I can depend on you, trust you. I thought you were my best friend. I guess not, because whenever I need to talk to you, YOU'RE NEVER THERE FOR ME. At first I thought I was never there for you, but now I see that it's the other way around. Seriously, I'd tell you more about myself, what's wrong, why I'm acting the way I'm acting, but you know what? I can't tell you since you're NEVER here to hear me. I don't think anyone is here for me when I just need to talk things out or something. Honestly. Especially you, my "best friend." I'm always comforting you, but you know what? You're not there when I need you anymore. I wish we can just go back to the old times, like over the summer where everything was bright, new and shiny.

But we can't go back now. Is this how you really want to spend your last year with me? All detached and cool? I have tried to reach out to you in many different ways. I've wanted to talk to you about some stuff, but I can't. You're always complaining about something. "I failed this test." or "I hate life" or "fml, so many tests and quizzes." or "omg I'm failing." 

Look, you AREN'T FAILING, OKAY? Jeez, I don't tell you anything anymore because you're always complaining about something and I just have no space in your mind. You know I do care about you, I love you very much, but...this is just too much for me. I can almost SWEAR you don't give a damn about me. Maybe you did a long time ago, but now you don't anymore. I'm just here, helping you whenever you need help, just being your friend, doing your work. God. Thanks for making me feel so damn used. This has been driving me crazy, and driving me close to the brink of tears for some time now. I'm going crazy, crazy, crazy.

You asked me today, "why so sad?" I wasn't sad, I was pissed off. Why should I show any emotion towards you anymore if you don't seem to give a flying fuck about me?

Oh, and another thing. Stop lying to me. I really hate it when you lie to me. It just makes me want to punch the wall or kick it. Stop playing mind games with me. You're going to be just as bad as that other person whom I detest.

This is what I've been trying to tell you, but you just never open to listen.